Santa Claus, An Engineering Retrospective

The question all parents have to hear, at one time or another, "Is Santa real?" Or for the more scholarly children out there, "Is it even a possibility that his task could be achievable?"  You've got to give them an answer, or to them, you'll look even stupider than normal, so here's a couple of references you can use to build your argument for, "yes, dear, he does - in fact, here's scientific proof of his existence."  
SmartTechnology - Technology For Change - Santa's Sleigh Propelled by Smart Technology

In my mind, though, it may just be easier to strip away the fantasy & tell'em he just doesn't exist. 

Is it theoretically possible?...

Or does he?  There are two more arguments on this subject that have been proposed by engineers, who apparently, wish to remain anonymous:


1 - Santa Claus: an Engineering Analysis - 
    
2 - Santa Claus: An Engineering Analysis - REBUTTAL - 

...or is it just another sad lie we tell our kids?

For the real non-believer, check out the website NORAD [North American Aerospace Defense Command] has dedicated to Santa-tracking, in case there's a chance he goes rogue... http://www.noradsanta.org/


And there is even a Santa Claus blog - http://clauschronicles.blogspot.com/ - and this article gives you his house-count.
  
The choice is up to you, do you want your kids living in a fantasy world of flying game, hyper-speed sleighs and all-knowing philanthropic old men?  Given the reality of the world today, maybe that is the way to go.

New law prohibits silent killing of blind pedestrians by Hybrid vehicle owners

Apparently blind pedestrian hunting season has been opened up by Hybrid vehicle owners, and the blind aren't too happy about it!  Hybrid owners have been getting away with murder lately, and going about that business with nothing more than a slight purr.  Now they, like most other purring prowlers, must announce their intent with more of a roar, or in this case vrroom.  And the blind pedestrians of the world finally feel that the playing field has been leveled.

http://washingtonexaminer.com/politics/2010/12/house-approves-bill-make-hybrids-louder

Anonymous Product Review: Cool new tool not for fools - or sissy-men.

The reviewer, who wishes to be known only as "ManlyManDan" [and says that the Dan part is only in there because it rhymes], says that his wife [which he doesn't really care if she remains anonymous because she deserves to be vilified in this situation, but identifying her would certainly draw out the author's true self, so therefore she gets away with it, this time], gave him looks like he was a sissy-man for using a loofah in the shower.  This prompted the purchase of the Dove Men's Care Shower Tool, and ManlyManDan says it does a "satisfactory job" cleaning his body and his "undercarriage and junk."  Here is the rest of ManlyManDan's review:

I recently switched from using a lady-likely-labeled loofah, to the new Dove Men's Care Shower Tool.  Immediately during my first use, I noticed that this product would revolutionize the way men sexfoliated© their skin.  Not only is it shaped like an athletic supporter that can be used on your face, but they also call it a tool, which makes it even more super-manly.  Upon my initial product run, I felt invigorated and alive in the shower, maybe even for the first time.  It really felt as though I was shaving skin off of my body, and made me feel like a snake molting, which we all know to be the epitome of cleanliness, and/or Godliness [depending on your religious views].  While the old sally of a loofah had better sudsing capabilities, this product had two settings for tearing dirty flesh off of a man:  either use the mesh side for lathering the soap all over your musculature while only removing the dirtiest of derma, or the scrub side, which has scrubbing powers that will literally clean you to the bone.

* A note on using the Tool on your "bone," however, avoid direct contact to the groinal area with the Shower Tool, as some users, who wish to remain even more anonymous, have reported scarring and painful abrasions to their units.  There is one other area I need not mention that requires a bit of skill and practice to master cleaning with the Shower Tool, so only advanced users should attempt this.  

With all of these great advantages, the Tool does come with a down-side: Dove recommends changing out for a new Tool every 4-6 weeks, which, ironically, is just about the time it takes to grow a manly bond with your Tool.  So, other than that, and not using the Tool on your tool, I say this product gets 4 1/2 big ups, G.

Cool new tool not for fools - or sissy-men.